dead duck
Today arrived with a crash of my car through the garage door.
Despite what your teacher may have told you, there is a wrong way to wield a lasso.
He realized there had been several deaths on this road, but his concern rose when he saw the exact number.
I received a heavy fine but it failed to crush my spirit.
He figured a few sticks of dynamite were easier than a fishing pole to catch fish.
I was very proud of my nickname throughout high school but today- I couldn’t be any different to what my nickname was.
Tom got a small piece of pie.
The irony of the situation wasn't lost on anyone in the room.
There aren't enough towels in the world to stop the sewage flowing from his mouth.
Always bring cinnamon buns on a deep-sea diving expedition.
Even with the snow falling outside, she felt it appropriate to wear her bikini.
There was no ice cream in the freezer, nor did they have money to go to the store.
He was the only member of the club who didn't like plum pudding.
Whenever he saw a red flag warning at the beach he grabbed his surfboard.
They were excited to see their first sloth.
He dreamed of leaving his law firm to open a portable dog wash.
She wrote him a long letter, but he didn't read it.
I often see the time 11:11 or 12:34 on clocks.
The river stole the gods.
At that moment she realized she had a sixth sense.
If eating three-egg omelets causes weight-gain, budgie eggs are a good substitute.
That was how he came to win $1 million.
A suit of armor provides excellent sun protection on hot days.
Mr. Montoya knows the way to the bakery even though he's never been there.
I always dreamed about being stranded on a desert island until it actually happened.
I caught my squirrel rustling through my gym bag.
Trash covered the landscape like sprinkles do a birthday cake.
Sarah ran from the serial killer holding a jug of milk.
He watched the dancing piglets with panda bear tummies in the swimming pool.
The clouds formed beautiful animals in the sky that eventually created a tornado to wreak havoc.
Nobody loves a pig wearing lipstick.
I was fishing for compliments and accidentally caught a trout.
Buried deep in the snow, he hoped his batteries were fresh in his avalanche beacon.
He was sure the Devil created red sparkly glitter.
The random sentence generator generated a random sentence about a random sentence.
A dead duck doesn't fly backward.
She lived on Monkey Jungle Road and that seemed to explain all of her strangeness.
She let the balloon float up into the air with her hopes and dreams.
Today I dressed my unicorn in preparation for the race.
I honestly find her about as intimidating as a basket of kittens.
Three years later, the coffin was still full of Jello.
Mary plays the piano.
As he dangled from the rope deep inside the crevasse
They throw cabbage that turns your brain into emotional baggage.
He swore he just saw his sushi move.
Sometimes you have to just give up and win by cheating.
The light that burns twice as bright burns half as long.
It was always dangerous to drive with him since he insisted the safety cones were a slalom course.
He stomped on his fruit loops and thus became a cereal killer.
I currently have 4 windows open up… and I don’t know why.
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